I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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