i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
