So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
