We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
