apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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