I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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