Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
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