Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
