OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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