I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
