Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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