is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
