OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
