Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she smelled like a LAN party
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
