What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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