your parents love me but you hate me
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Randomize
