I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
