Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
