I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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