Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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