we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize