And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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