I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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