Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
