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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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