all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
