dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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