Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
