Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize