I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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