I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I lost the right to judge tonight
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
