I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
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