my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
