So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize