Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
