I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
