i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
