I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
