Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
