i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize