How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
