R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize