So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize