I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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