Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
