we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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