Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
