Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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