We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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