Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
